Dry roast the garlic, coconut and shallots till brown and grind into a fine paste with garam masala powder. keep aside
heat the oil in a wok and add the mustard seeds. wait for them to splutter
add the asafoetida, onions and curry leaves
sauté till onions brown slightly
add the chopped gourd next
sauté for 2 minutes on Low heat for the gourd to absorb some oil
add the ground masala paste and sauté further for 2 minutes
followed by salt and red chilli powder
mix well and add the milk carefully
cook covered until the gourd soften
take off heat and transfer into a bowl
serve warm with rice preparations,garnished with coriander leaves